debor067

It's funny how tiny details can trigger big memories. Just the other day, for example. I was cooking, I needed an egg, so I opened the fridge, and my eyes settled on the date stamped on the end of the carton. Wham. In an instant I was 25 years back in time, sitting in a Relief Society Homemaking Meeting. --Now, before I go on, I should explain that everyone who is lucky enough to be a member of the one and only true church is conditioned to believe she must attend every single meeting in order to partake of the special knowledge that a poor nonmember isn't privy to. Likewise, everyone who is lucky enough to have escaped the one and only true church can recall a series of "aha" moments when she realized this so-called special knowledge maybe wasn't all that special after all. Back to my "aha" moment 25 years ago. I was sitting in Relief Society listening to a presentation on thrifty shopping tips. The teacher, a young blonde with a feathery hairdo, picked...

pi-o-neer , n : one who goes before, as into the wilderness, preparing the way for others to follow; as, pioneers  of civilization, of reform, or in science; also an early settler; a colonist; as, the American pioneers. _______________________________ One of the many things that I am thankful for is that I never made one of those phony pioneer treks that today's Mormon youth get to are forced to undergo. I imagine they vary according to area, but every participant I've spoken with has recalled the experience with the sort of descriptives one would naturally apply to a bunch of overdressed, sweaty adolescents pushing handcarts in the blazing heat. A friend of mine, who acted as a youth leader on one of these ordeals, claimed that his ward dressed up like the Utah pioneers, went to a local (D.C. area) park or field and slogged around in circles for an entire week. -- Sort of the antithesis of an actual pioneer journey. Although it could be the ultimate paradigm for the Mormon ...

Years ago a woman in the ward whom I considered to be an actual friend dropped by my house after yet another meeting that I had missed. Convinced that my lagging church attendance would bring about my ruin, she began her remarks with, "I just have to say this," and then bemoaned the fate of my marriage and fretted over what might become of my poor children. Because I considered her to be an actual friend, I listened politely. Then, when she finally finished, I countered with, "Okay, then I have to say this," and began to explain my misgivings about the Mormon Church, beginning with the marginalization of LDS women. Aghast that I would actually criticize the leaders of the one and only true church, she shut down the conversation, doing everything short of covering her ears and singing Praise to the Man  at the top of her lungs. --This was back when I foolishly assumed that I also got to say things. Similarly, a couple of years later, another woman from the ward whom...

To: Abbottsville Fourth Ward From: Virgil Hanson, Ward Employment Specialist Subject: Opportunities at Party On  Abbottsville!  Ward members who are looking for work may new find openings at Party On  Abbottsville!  soon. Buoyed by Hobby Lobby's recent Supreme Court victory, Brian Samuelson, the devout Mormon owner of our local party supply chain has boldly changed company policy to reflect LDS values. Read the in-store memo below: To All Employees In light of the Supreme Court ruling on  Burwell v. Hobby Lobby , the employees at Party On   Abbottsville!  will now be required to enjoy the lifestyle and religious freedoms embraced by believing members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.     Effective immediately: All male employees will wear white dress shirts, ties, navy blue polyester slacks and have no facial hair, tattoos or piercings. All female employees will wear calf-length denim jumpers, gingham-checked blouses and onl...