debor067

False Prophet , my sequel to The Girls from Fourth Ward, is now available.  " In the summer of 2008, the brutal murder of a devout Mormon widower sends Lieutenant Ryan back into the LDS community of Abbottsville, California. This time his investigation leads him inside the Mormon temple, behind the scenes at an LDS mission home, and into the workings of the Mormon campaign to pass Proposition 8." Excerpt: The old man lay face down on the living room floor, his frac-tured skull in a puddle of blood and one hand on the phone. I turned to Gatz and Mosely from Forensics. “When’d you get here?”  “Ten minutes ago. He was already dead, but not for long.” I stepped into paper booties and approached the corpse. His other hand was wedged beneath his chest, forcing an unnatural bulge. I pulled a pair of latex gloves from my coat pocket. “Would you guys pick him up? I want to see what’s underneath.” Gatz and Mosely lifted in tandem. I squatted down and turned over a blood soaked le...

So I had the dream again, the one I've been having since I left the LDS Church. The setting varies, but the message is always the same. In the most common scenario, I'm soaking in the bathtub and the men in suits walk in. I scream/try to cover myself/tell them to leave, and they either ignore me or say, "It's okay, Sister Banta, you're not in the way." The other night's setting was more complex. I was living in a communal house with some church members. We shared a bathroom. There was a lock on the bathroom door that I didn't know how to use, but everyone else did. So I'd go into the bathroom, start to undress, and somebody would barge in. I kept asking people to show me how to use the lock, but nobody would help me. After I'd been intruded on a few times I gave up and told the landlord I was moving out. He was a guy in a suit. "Sister Banta," he said. "You can't leave until you talk to your bishop." I snickered, then gi...

To: Abbottsville Fourth Ward From: J. "Bull" Barton, Ward Preparedness Specialist Subject: Sex is not for fun! Thanks to Tea Party activist, Jerome Corsi, I have decided to lower the ward threat level to orange . A nonmember, but nevertheless a champion of traditional marriage, Corsi made the following inspired observation  before a conservative gathering in Oregon: “If you want to have fun, read a book, go to a movie. Sex is about the procreation of children. It’s a sacred responsibility that is meant by God to have men and women commit their lifetime to children.” As members of the one and only true church, we have always known there are plenty of things that are funner than sex. Recently, the Brethren compiled a list of alternative activities. Here is an excerpt: Church Approved Alternatives to Sex Read a book Watch a movie Tinker in your garage Macrame Rearrange the furniture Take pictures of old barns Watch FOXNews Whittle Tend your bonsai Pay your tithing Eat prunes Co...

Some years ago, Mark and I attended a book club discussion at a local Unitarian Church. Because our topic was Under the Banner of Heaven by Jon Krakauer, there were several former Mormons in attendance -- a young man in his twenties, a thirty-something woman, Mark and I (in our late forties), a woman in her sixties, and a gentleman in his eighties. Those in the group who had never been Mormon were intrigued by the following exchange: Twenty-year-old man : When I was a Mormon I was told that I was a member of the most righteous generation, charged with the assignment of ushering in the apocalypse. Thirty-something woman : I was told that too. Mark and I : So were we. Woman in her sixties : So was I. Gent in his eighties : Me too. Now, doubters and anti-Mormons might jump to the erroneous conclusion that this is yet another example of the Mormons' penchant for passing down lies to their children. But last night, over wine and cioppino at Annabelle's , Mark and I came to a differe...